3MM: Friends, Men & Others


3 MINUTE MONDAY

Hi friend,

I’m in Miami!

Two huge episodes today here then back to Austin tomorrow for another massive one on Thursday.

Wild stuff, looking forward to no travel for a while starting soon though.

A friend was recently asked who his best friend is.

He said he wasn’t sure, that’s a bit of a rare question after age 12.

So the question was asked differently.

“Who do you have the least amount of filter with when you’re around them?”

What a fantastic reframe.

Another good question here is “who you can sit in silence with and not have to fill it?”

Even if there isn’t a single person that wins, these are the people you should prioritise spending your time with.

We all feel the compulsion to change ourselves to fit in.

We adjust our behaviour, words, nature, everything in an attempt to be liked, validated and accepted.

The more people who make it feel safe for you to truly be yourself around them, the more confidence you’ll have to be that person every day.

MODERN WISDOM

I do a podcast which has had 480 million+ downloads. You should subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

This week’s upcoming episodes:

Monday.
Dr Rhonda Patrick - some great insights around training for longevity, fitness, VO2 max, insights on diet and more. So so good.

Thursday.
Macken Murphy - what do humans find attractive? Why do we like what we like? What about tattoos, muscles, beards, boobs, waist-to-hip ratio, facial symmetry and more? Don’t miss this.

Saturday.
1.75m Q&A - a different vibe with this one. Really trying to be more open and honest about the way I’ve been feeling the last few months. I hope this one makes sense.

THINGS I'VE LEARNED

1.
Find the others.

“Admit it.

You aren’t like them.

You’re not even close.

You may occasionally dress yourself up as one of them, watch the same mindless television shows as they do, maybe even eat the same fast food sometimes.

But it seems that the more you try to fit in, the more you feel like an outsider, watching the ‘normal people’ as they go about their automatic existences.

For every time you say club passwords like ‘Have a nice day’ and ‘Weather’s awful today, eh?’ you yearn inside to say forbidden things like ‘Tell me something that makes you cry’ or ‘What do you think deja vu is for?’

Face it, you even want to talk to that girl in the elevator.

But what if that girl in the elevator (and the balding man who walks past your cubicle at work) are thinking the same thing?

Who knows what you might learn from taking a chance on conversation with a stranger?

Everybody carries a piece of the puzzle.

Nobody comes into your life by mere coincidence.

Trust your instincts.

Do the unexpected.

Find the others.” — Timothy Leary

2.
Men get into more fist fights than women.

“They play more violent video games and watch more violent movies.

They’re more likely to be hospitalized for punching walls.

They’re more likely to fantasize about killing another person.

They’re more likely to actually kill another person.

And they’re more likely to kill themselves.

For low-level violence – a slap or a shove – the gender gap is surprisingly small.

But as we move up the scale, from minor to more extreme forms of violence, the gap grows larger with every step.

By the time we arrive at the most extreme form of one-on-one violence – homicide – men are virtually the sole perpetrators.

Globally, more than 90 percent of homicides are committed by men.

Most victims are men as well: around 70 percent.

Interestingly, the figures for chimpanzees are nearly identical; one chimpicide study found that 92 percent of killers were males and 73 percent of victims.” — Steve Stewart-Williams

3.
There’s two types of people.

"The world is split between those who don't know how to start making money and those who don't know when to stop." — Nassim Taleb

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Big love,
Chris x

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PS
Training vlog with CBum coming soon too. We got to catch up this weekend.

3 Minute Monday

Podcaster with 600m+ plays. I write about the most important lessons I learn from the best thinkers on the planet. 200,000+ people read my free newsletter. Press subscribe to join.

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