3 Minute Monday

3MM: Cynicism, Poor People & Marriage

Published about 1 month ago • 3 min read


Hi friend,

“On social media, fools feel clever by mocking bigger fools, and scoundrels feel virtuous by condemning bigger scoundrels.
We feel good simply by portraying others as worse.
In an age of anxiety & inaction, many seek self-esteem not in their own abilities, but in other's failures.” — Gurwinder Bhogal

This is one of my least favourite trends.

I am so bored of cynicism on the internet.

I'm sick of seeing comment sections just filled with self-defeating, world-hating nihilists who are adamant that the world is against them and it's people who have goals that are the issue.

People whose only successes involve standing on the shoulders of others’ shortcomings.

Gesturing at the public failure of any everyone else in the hope that their legitimacy never gets scrutinised.

This is the Cynicism Safety Blanket.

“Cynicism is a guarded response.
You're setting yourself up against disappointment.
Its role within the system is to protect you against experiencing anything bad.
It is a pre-emptive strike against a perceived threat.
If I tell myself that 'all women are bad', then I'm less likely to seek a relationship with women and, as a consequence, I'm never going to feel the pain of rejection.
If I tell myself that 'everything is shit' or that 'things will never get better', then I am excused of ever having to try at anything.
It's more comfortable to get fatalistic and call it pragmatism.
The cope is framing hope as pathetic and embarrassing and optimism as delusion.
It’s “sour grapes" at an existential level.
If everything sucks, and everyone is horrible, and reality is disappointing and you know that for a fact, it's the people acting like things can be better that are dumb, delusional and the problem.
The upside of never trying is never having to feel the pain of failure.”

Get fucked bro. I don't want your influence within 1000 miles of my life.

“It’s good to criticise the vile aspects of the world, but there is nothing more vile than to do nothing about it and convince others to do the same.” — Ryan Lazarus

I believe in hope.

I want to be around people who have a positive vision for themselves, and others, and the world.

I advise you do the same.

“Choosing to see the good in things (while not being naive) is a superpower.” — Chasing Adaptation


I do a podcast which has had 500 million+ downloads. You should subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

This week’s upcoming episodes:

Tim Ferriss - the podcasting OG and all round fascinating human joins me to discuss his best hacks, lessons, books and insights from 20 years of self-experimentation. Absolutely fantastic episode.

Connor Beaton - what is attachment theory? How do you work out your attachment style? Why do our attachment styles come about? How can you improve yours? How do you cope with a partner who is not securely attached?

Roanne Van Voorst - a researcher spent 5 years looking at what the future of sex and relationships is going to be like. Including going to a robo-sex brothel, paying for a best friend, getting an erotic massage and an AI girlfriend. Fascinating.


Walking through First Class on planes makes passengers angry.

Researchers studied 1,500-4,000 incidents of air rage that occurred on 1-5 million flights.

After controlling for factors such as legroom, flight delays, and travel time, the researchers found that the chances of an air rage incident in the economy cabin are nearly four times higher when there is a first-class cabin on the plane.

This is the same increase in odds as when there is an additional nine-and-a-half hour delay.

The data also showed that when passengers boarded through the front of the plane, through first class (as opposed to boarding from the middle of the plane), episodes of air rage in economy more than doubled.

“The Poverty Parade.”

“Our frustration with airlines has increased, but it becomes more salient when we see what we have and what other people have” said the researchers.

Interestingly, the researchers found that the first-class passengers were affected by visible inequality as well.

When all passengers boarded through the front of the plane via first class, incidents of air rage in the first-class cabin increased by a factor of nearly 12. — h/t CNTraveler

Age and marriage status are correlated differently between men and women.

“Number of unmarried men per 100 unmarried women, by age:

25 year olds: 118 men for every 100 women

45 year olds: 98 men for every 100 women

64 year olds: 62 men for every 100 women” — h/t Rob Henderson

Americans spend more time on screens than asleep.

“Per day, according to DataReportal, the average American spends 5 hours and 30 minutes sleeping (an all-time low) and 7 hours and 11 minutes on screens (an all-time high).” — Dylano from Essayful


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Big love,
Chris x

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This Tim episode looks phenomenal on YouTube. Give it a glance after 4pm UK/11am ET.

3 Minute Monday

by Chris Williamson

Podcaster with 400m+ plays. I write about the most important lessons I learn from the best thinkers on the planet. 160,000+ people read my free newsletter. Press subscribe to join.

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